** UPDATE : My friend is alive and well and had been meaning to write even before I wrote this post. You are forgiven, friend. Not that there was anything to forgive, but hey, if you mention guilt, I think it’s only fair to mention forgiveness. :) **
Soooooo…. let’s say you had a friend. And let’s say that the friend was rather notorious for not staying in touch with various other people, but that you and said friend had always maintained pretty good contact with each other. And let’s say that the friend came into town for a visit and that when you said goodbye at the airport the next day, it was the last time you ever heard from the friend. No email to say the flight was ok. Nothing.
And then let’s say that you emailed the friend a little while after that and never received a response.
And then months went by. And still nothing. Even when you referenced the friend in a blog post, something that generally at least elicited an email from said friend in the past.
So, you decided to try again and send another, “Are you alive?” type emails, to which you again have received no response.
What of the following options would YOU choose?
A) Assume friend is now including you in group of people rarely contacted
B) Assume friend is dead and mourn appropriately
C) Assume friend no longer wants to be friend and mourn appropriately
The thing is, option C just doesn’t sound like my friend. But who knows? Maybe I didn’t know my friend as well as I thought I did. Still, I’m leaning toward option A. I’m just a little surprised that I didn’t get a quick “helloI’mstillherejustreallybusy” kind of reply.
Notice I’m really not devoting any time at all to Option B. I’m pretty sure I’d have heard something by now.
Oh well. Seeing as this post is “sooooo junior high,” if my friend is reading this… YOU’RE A DORK! EMAIL ME, YOU DORK!
No, not junior high at all. I have a friend that does similar stuff. If I didn’t know that she was stopping by my blog sometimes, because I knew her IP addy, I’d think she was dead or ignoring me.
I think I made a post like that once and it jolted her into awareness. I hope your friend becomes more communicative.
That was hilarious! Go with B!! I jest, I feel for you I do. Sometimes you can’t decide between wanting to smack them and disown them. But you love them and making them dead to you just feels so wrong!
Good luck, I hope your dork contacts you and doesn’t become too offended at your fun attempt to see if they still have a pulse.
If I had a nickel for every “are you alive?” e-mail, both from friends and work contacts, I could retire.
I like people. I even miss them. But I never have time to write a thoughtful response, and by the time I “mark as unread” the message so I can follow up with it, it gets lost with the 400 others I’ve flagged the same way.
I wouldn’t take it personally if I were you. Some people have the empathy/relational genes and the rest of us short-circuit at the thought of not only rekindling a friendship, but also having to keep it up.