1) Every single baseball announcer comparing Kosuke Fukodome to Icharo and Matsui. I get it - they’re all from Japan. But every. single. game. with a new announcer… they throw up the photo of Fukudome next to a shot of Icharo… it’s getting old. Wake up, baseball announcers! You’re not saying ANYTHING new - especially you ESPN guys.

2) Every single baseball announcer commenting on the fact that it’s strange for Alfonso Soriano to be hitting in the lead off spot. Does it really freaking matter? After the first inning, there’s no guarantee he’ll be up first again. Again, old news. Quit rehashing what others have already stated. You all make me want to turn my volume down! Except Len and Bob, of course.

3) The three men currently residing in my home. Hellooooo… doctor’s orders state I’m not supposed to be doing dishes. Pick up some slack, you slackers. And do NOT point out to me that my cereal bowl is still sitting on the counter, unless you’d like a rundown of how many things you currently have strewn about the rest of the house. When everyone else living here is working 40 hours a week, we’ll talk about the unfair distribution of housework. Until then, do my bidding - you bastards!

4) Tendinitis. It hurts. ‘Nuff said.

5) Crying over the fate of animals. After watching the Kentucky Derby yesterday, I ecstatically rooted for Eight Belles and was thrilled to see her come in second, beating out all those boys except the favorite. And then I was devastated only moments later when they announced that she’d broken both of her front ankles and had to be euthanized right there on the track. I looked at The Boyfriend in absolute horror and pleaded with him to change the channel immediately. And then I burst into tears. I know it was the humane thing for them to do, but the bizarre timing of the two events just rattled me. I’m tearing up again just thinking about it.

6) Being abandoned by The Boyfriend on a gorgeous spring day. He met friends for disc golf at noon. At 4:30, he finally called me to say he was at JoJo’s. And then he went back to the park for more golf, finally sauntering in at 7 p.m. So, I hung out here alone all day, frustrated over the fact that I couldn’t do any yardwork because of the tendinitis. And now? He’s sound asleep, oblivious to how pissed off I really am. Dork.