Dear Library to the North,
Even though I heard the rumors about you, I’d hoped that we could be friends. I thought maybe the people in charge of lending were just stupid and didn’t know any better, and that’s why they always send crappy hard-to-read articles and never respond when there’s a problem. I’d hoped that maybe our relationship might be different, that perhaps you’d just gotten off on the wrong foot with TOTO and Trouble and maybe, just maybe, you and I would turn out to be friends - not BFF, but good friends.
Admittedly, I was taken aback the day I opened the invoice drawer and found not one, not two, but SIX unpaid invoices for books that you or your patrons had lost, but never replaced. Is this how friends treat each other? Wouldn’t it be polite for you to reimburse us for the property you borrowed but didn’t care for properly?
But it didn’t shake my faith in your entirely. After all, the woman I replaced was still lending you things, so perhaps she’d seen something good and redeeming in you. It was enough to make me want to take a chance on you.
And then I made that amateur mistake. I mistakenly sent you a book requested by another university and I sent them the book you’d requested. The error was caught right away. You were actually the one who caught it first and you called right away and left a message with the woman I was replacing. But that was her last day of work and I was caught up in asking her last minute questions. I vowed to make things right the following Monday.
When the time came, I was a little overwhelmed and since my ability to take notes during phone conversations ranks right up there with my ability to sit still long enough to watch a movie (in other words, I suck at it), I used my best form of communication: writing. I sent you an email.
The weird thing was that I didn’t hear back from you. For two weeks, even after I received the other stray book back from the library, there was nary a sound coming from your direction. So, I enclosed a note with the book I was sending to you. I asked you to forward the book on to the other library, or send it back to me, but to let me know what you were going to do either way. And still, I heard nothing.
It saddened me. What did I do to offend you so? Did I disgust you by sending you the wrong book in the first place? Was it something I said?
Finally, nearly a month after that initial email, I emailed you again last night. This time, I used a different contact, someone whose title sounded a bit more… managerial. I used a read receipt. I used a delivery receipt. Funny… I never received notification of the delivery, but I did get a response to the email.
When I saw it was from you, I rejoiced! For about 30 seconds. Until it became clear from reading your email that you were implying I had dropped the ball. That the woman who’d called had never heard a response and didn’t know what to do with the book.
Riiiiight. Funny that when I emailed you back, thanking you for the update and letting you know that in fact I had attempted to contact her, not once but twice, I didn’t get anything in the way of an apology. Perhaps it was my not-so-subtle hint of letting you know that I prefer to handle these matters in writing, so that I have a record of what is said and done. Because now you know that I know that all of those rumors I’ve heard aren’t rumors at all.
You really do suck.
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